This article strikes a particularly nerve with me. A nerve heavily frayed from many hours in the seat of a mountain bike. It all started innocently enough. A friend loaned me his old bike and showed me the local trails. Having lived in southern California all my life I was mesmerized by this previously hidden world. So many trails, so much beautiful scenery and views. Plus my fitness hit all time highs. But then “it” crept in. That insidious feeling of memetic desire. My friend would say things like “hey Jim, you should get the Strava app. You can post your ride and see how you rank”. Or “hey Jim, I heard about these 24 hour mountain bike races, we should start a team”. And so it went until we stumbled on the “vision quest”. This is a punishing 55 mile mountain bike race dubbed one of the 10 most grueling events in the world. I never did the race. The training was sucking away all the joy I had been experiencing as a mediocre rider. Going hard felt like the right thing to do. But ultimately I stopped riding entirely and haven’t been back in years. Lesson learned for me was enjoy the thing for the sake of the thing. No need to turn everything into a competition.
I am supremely non-competitive and got a mountain bike in 2022 because road cycling started boring me and trail hiking made me miss being on a bike. It's been fun building a different cycling skillset and as you said discovering new trails and views (in this case in Austin, Texas). I am just about ready to graduate from sneakers to clip-in pedals.
😂😂😂 my guess is that it’s either dehydration or hormonal in some way / a disruption to our hormones somehow induced by getting up early. I need a man to weigh in because so far it’s only women who tell me they experience this
Late here but I have early morning nausea AND feel sick all day if I don’t get enough sleep. I haven’t found a single other person in my life who feels this! Google says it’s a cortisol spike but idk
I'm a woman and this always happens to me! I used to associate it with being at the airport specifically because of budget early morning flights but now I understand it happens whenever I get too little sleep, less than 4 or 5 hours. I always just assumed it my body literally saying "fuck you, go back to sleep"
I've definitely noticed some of these trends in how we talk about (and participate in) hobbies - and there's a lot of truth to what you've pointed out. One is the idea that our limits are self-imposed (to some extent) and we can often do a lot more than we think we can. I found this out kind of unintentionally, as I got further into an extremely demanding and time-consuming career that left me with a lot less downtime; despite much less free time, I felt I ended up using it better, and didn't feel like I was really missing out on much compared to what I was doing before. (Maybe some of this is what I tell myself to cope...)
I recognize that a lot of people find the idea of diligently pursuing a goal to be the motivation they need in their hobbies and not just their professional lives. I admire and respect that in some people, when they don't go on to gate-keep and dismiss others who can't put in the same degree of dedication. But I definitely do not feel like one of those people who thrives when I add that pressure to my off time! I felt quite the opposite, actually. Being able to explore various interests without judging myself for a lack of commitment or talent made me enjoy them *more*. I definitely feel better when my down time isn't all spent doing nothing (or: scrolling and enveloped in the glow of various screens.) But I, personally, am in the camp that hobbies should be things we enjoy doing, and that we don't need to be good at them, or consistent about them, etc. When I started to embrace that mindset, I found myself feeling much more balanced.
I’ve historically been reluctant to try new things because of ~perfectionism~ but it makes me sick how much time I’ve spent anxiously scrolling on Small Screen with Big Screen playing something else instead.
This summer, my husband and I took a sailing class with another couple and have been sailing a few times since, which has been so much fun. This essay makes me want to lean in even more to this new hobby and finally try something new that I’ve been wanting to do on my own, too!
Add a child or children to the mix and it’s a completely different calculus! The changing/expanding sense that comes with parenthood completely eliminated most of my hobbies and spare time and I’ve completely reevaluated my relationship with work and anything that resembles work. I desperately miss hobbies but it feels like even more work to integrate them back into my life post-kid.
I’d also add the cost factor here; $2,000/yr for BJJ seemed fine until my daughter started playing sports and doing other extracurriculars, too. There’s only so much money in that bucket, and as her life requires more of it, there is less and less left over for my wife and I to have hobbies that cost.
You just described me to a T. I pour all my energy and mindshare into my business and have nothing left for leisure and hobbies. When something non-work related requires planning (such as travel) I dread it and put it off, even though it's something I enjoy. Oh and I refuse to do early morning flights despite living 20 minutes from the Sacramento airport.
Wow. I just realized almost every hobby I have involves media consumption. I don't do much of anything. And I thought I was doing good by deleting tiktok and instagram and reading books.
As someone who also lives in Northern CA, thank you for the reminder to leave the house on the weekends to actually get out and enjoy nature on purpose! I've started "training for a 5k" instead of just "going to the gym" and it does motivate me much more. Now off to make an offline Google Maps Guide to the oldest named redwoods to visit!
This is so insightful and definitely a great reminder to put more thought and intention into the activities we do in our leisure time. I love what your friend said about effort and exertion not being a finite resource because the more you use them, the more you can stretch your "sense of self and capability." Thank you for sharing!
Yes to nausea with early waking and having to get going too soon. I thought it was peri-menopause (or just plain menopause at this point idk) b/c I haven't always been this way, but it's been years now. What I decided it was -- the surge of adrenaline that comes with waking early (almost like you're startled) and then with the let-down afterwards, most people are nauseous after adrenaline surges, in combination with estrogen levels being wonky. But I'm a lawyer not a doctor, so who knows. Though I am about to start nursing school and have just finished up two years of science prerequisites after raising 4 kids, realizing that no one in law will accept me back into their ranks (frustrating). So, that's what I did with all my extra time as my kids got older and went off to college -- got back to "work" learning something new -- science, and also adopted two puppies (def alot of work)!
All of this sounds incredible, but YES to the early morning barfiness. it is the worst. Agreeing I only know women who are this way. But I remember being this way in my teens.
Yes to waking up early and being nauseous it's awful. Usually I just don't eat until later and that can help but it's so iffy and horrible. Maybe tmi but I do tend to have my normal BM in the mornings about an hour after waking up but if I'm waking early for a flight then it will adjust to the new time and I wondered if that had something to do with it.
Regarding the meat of your story - I've been thinking about this as I start a Master's program at the age of 33 and how much time it takes up but I really enjoy doing the work (only in week 2, ask me in 4 weeks how I feel). Also I'm sore and sunburnt slightly from weekend plan of going to a lake that had inflatable obstacles because my niblings wanted my husband and I to go back with them. Very physical and re-learned that I can't play with an 8 year old like I'm 8, I need breaks!
This article strikes a particularly nerve with me. A nerve heavily frayed from many hours in the seat of a mountain bike. It all started innocently enough. A friend loaned me his old bike and showed me the local trails. Having lived in southern California all my life I was mesmerized by this previously hidden world. So many trails, so much beautiful scenery and views. Plus my fitness hit all time highs. But then “it” crept in. That insidious feeling of memetic desire. My friend would say things like “hey Jim, you should get the Strava app. You can post your ride and see how you rank”. Or “hey Jim, I heard about these 24 hour mountain bike races, we should start a team”. And so it went until we stumbled on the “vision quest”. This is a punishing 55 mile mountain bike race dubbed one of the 10 most grueling events in the world. I never did the race. The training was sucking away all the joy I had been experiencing as a mediocre rider. Going hard felt like the right thing to do. But ultimately I stopped riding entirely and haven’t been back in years. Lesson learned for me was enjoy the thing for the sake of the thing. No need to turn everything into a competition.
I am supremely non-competitive and got a mountain bike in 2022 because road cycling started boring me and trail hiking made me miss being on a bike. It's been fun building a different cycling skillset and as you said discovering new trails and views (in this case in Austin, Texas). I am just about ready to graduate from sneakers to clip-in pedals.
Those last two sentences - yes.
Yes to all of this, but especially the part about early morning barfiness. Please report back if you figure out what this is! Are we just dehydrated??
😂😂😂 my guess is that it’s either dehydration or hormonal in some way / a disruption to our hormones somehow induced by getting up early. I need a man to weigh in because so far it’s only women who tell me they experience this
Late here but I have early morning nausea AND feel sick all day if I don’t get enough sleep. I haven’t found a single other person in my life who feels this! Google says it’s a cortisol spike but idk
I'm a woman and this always happens to me! I used to associate it with being at the airport specifically because of budget early morning flights but now I understand it happens whenever I get too little sleep, less than 4 or 5 hours. I always just assumed it my body literally saying "fuck you, go back to sleep"
I've definitely noticed some of these trends in how we talk about (and participate in) hobbies - and there's a lot of truth to what you've pointed out. One is the idea that our limits are self-imposed (to some extent) and we can often do a lot more than we think we can. I found this out kind of unintentionally, as I got further into an extremely demanding and time-consuming career that left me with a lot less downtime; despite much less free time, I felt I ended up using it better, and didn't feel like I was really missing out on much compared to what I was doing before. (Maybe some of this is what I tell myself to cope...)
I recognize that a lot of people find the idea of diligently pursuing a goal to be the motivation they need in their hobbies and not just their professional lives. I admire and respect that in some people, when they don't go on to gate-keep and dismiss others who can't put in the same degree of dedication. But I definitely do not feel like one of those people who thrives when I add that pressure to my off time! I felt quite the opposite, actually. Being able to explore various interests without judging myself for a lack of commitment or talent made me enjoy them *more*. I definitely feel better when my down time isn't all spent doing nothing (or: scrolling and enveloped in the glow of various screens.) But I, personally, am in the camp that hobbies should be things we enjoy doing, and that we don't need to be good at them, or consistent about them, etc. When I started to embrace that mindset, I found myself feeling much more balanced.
I’ve historically been reluctant to try new things because of ~perfectionism~ but it makes me sick how much time I’ve spent anxiously scrolling on Small Screen with Big Screen playing something else instead.
This summer, my husband and I took a sailing class with another couple and have been sailing a few times since, which has been so much fun. This essay makes me want to lean in even more to this new hobby and finally try something new that I’ve been wanting to do on my own, too!
Add a child or children to the mix and it’s a completely different calculus! The changing/expanding sense that comes with parenthood completely eliminated most of my hobbies and spare time and I’ve completely reevaluated my relationship with work and anything that resembles work. I desperately miss hobbies but it feels like even more work to integrate them back into my life post-kid.
I’d also add the cost factor here; $2,000/yr for BJJ seemed fine until my daughter started playing sports and doing other extracurriculars, too. There’s only so much money in that bucket, and as her life requires more of it, there is less and less left over for my wife and I to have hobbies that cost.
You just described me to a T. I pour all my energy and mindshare into my business and have nothing left for leisure and hobbies. When something non-work related requires planning (such as travel) I dread it and put it off, even though it's something I enjoy. Oh and I refuse to do early morning flights despite living 20 minutes from the Sacramento airport.
Wow. I just realized almost every hobby I have involves media consumption. I don't do much of anything. And I thought I was doing good by deleting tiktok and instagram and reading books.
As someone who also lives in Northern CA, thank you for the reminder to leave the house on the weekends to actually get out and enjoy nature on purpose! I've started "training for a 5k" instead of just "going to the gym" and it does motivate me much more. Now off to make an offline Google Maps Guide to the oldest named redwoods to visit!
just here to say i also get nauseous when i wake up super early. or if i get less than 5 hours of sleep.
This is so insightful and definitely a great reminder to put more thought and intention into the activities we do in our leisure time. I love what your friend said about effort and exertion not being a finite resource because the more you use them, the more you can stretch your "sense of self and capability." Thank you for sharing!
LOVE THS!! And also yes, I’m also nauseous early in the morning and I also try not to book early morning flights because of it
Absolutely it resonates. My therapist tell me to have more fun and plan less, proooobably on a weekly basis. So relatable. 😅
Yes to nausea with early waking and having to get going too soon. I thought it was peri-menopause (or just plain menopause at this point idk) b/c I haven't always been this way, but it's been years now. What I decided it was -- the surge of adrenaline that comes with waking early (almost like you're startled) and then with the let-down afterwards, most people are nauseous after adrenaline surges, in combination with estrogen levels being wonky. But I'm a lawyer not a doctor, so who knows. Though I am about to start nursing school and have just finished up two years of science prerequisites after raising 4 kids, realizing that no one in law will accept me back into their ranks (frustrating). So, that's what I did with all my extra time as my kids got older and went off to college -- got back to "work" learning something new -- science, and also adopted two puppies (def alot of work)!
All of this sounds incredible, but YES to the early morning barfiness. it is the worst. Agreeing I only know women who are this way. But I remember being this way in my teens.
Yes to waking up early and being nauseous it's awful. Usually I just don't eat until later and that can help but it's so iffy and horrible. Maybe tmi but I do tend to have my normal BM in the mornings about an hour after waking up but if I'm waking early for a flight then it will adjust to the new time and I wondered if that had something to do with it.
Regarding the meat of your story - I've been thinking about this as I start a Master's program at the age of 33 and how much time it takes up but I really enjoy doing the work (only in week 2, ask me in 4 weeks how I feel). Also I'm sore and sunburnt slightly from weekend plan of going to a lake that had inflatable obstacles because my niblings wanted my husband and I to go back with them. Very physical and re-learned that I can't play with an 8 year old like I'm 8, I need breaks!
Loved this Katie, and as a side note, I get nauseous when I’m overtired late at night. 🤷♀️